The Merchant of Venice: Stage vs. Film

The Merchant of Venice: Stage vs. Film

The Merchant of Venice, by William Shakespeare is a play of hatred and racism. In this play, it specifically follows the journey of Christianity versus Judaism. The Merchant of Venice, runs at the University of Northern Colorado from April 23-25 and May 1-3, 2009. The play at UNC is set in 1600 in Venice and Belmont, Italy. During this time, Italy is racist towards the Jewish people. Showing their hatred the Italian people would lock the Jewish people up in Ghettos’ every night. The Merchant of Venice, has issues the United States and other countries around the world still encounter today. The characters in this show can be anyone who encompasses hatred for others who are different from themselves. This show is a mirror to human behavior and emotions. It is interesting to see how a Shakespeare play still has an effect on society today. Comparing the stage version to the movie version is also interesting; there are a few differences, but also many similarities in script, characters, and staging.

The script in the movie and the stage version are very similar. Since William Shakespeare is so well known, and is completely a classic playwright, the writing in his shows stays the same. William Shakespeare writes in Prose and Iambic Pentameter. Nerissa speaks Prose in this play and everyone else speaks in Iambic Pentameter. The script in the movie and the stage are completely the same. The only difference is the staged show had a few different cuts then what the movie expresses. Tracy Salter, who directs The Merchant of Venice, at UNC, made very good cuts on the show. Watching the show, the audience stays attentive and drawn in to the world of the play. It is difficult to feel that way while watching a movie. The difference with watching The Merchant of Venice on a television verses on stage is simple. With one, a small box displays what has been filmed and edited to portray a certain meaning. With the other, it is right in front of you on stage. Each audience member can make their own interpretation of the lines and discover their own meaning. Someone may completely see the theme of hatred and racism. Whereas, others may discover the themes of friendship and true love or the important search for justice and mercy. The script reveals the themes. Seeing a Shakespearean play on stage enhances the language William Shakespeare wrote. Seeing a movie of a Shakespearean play diminishes the language. It just is not the same hearing the language live versus on the screen. Hearing the language and seeing acting right in front of you, is more effective, because you can react to what you see with everyone else giving you a heightened experience. The audience and you are seeing this for the first time, and everything is always enhanced when seeing it for the first time; not knowing what to expect.

The characters in the movie, script, and stage show are surprisingly all similar. There are qualities that are enhanced and diminished within the movie and the play, and each character portrays them. Watching the movie, the character of Portia comes to mind. In the movie, she is a fair skinned girl, who is preparing to get married to a suitor who “chooses” the right chest that hopefully contains a portrait of herself. The suitor must find her counterpart. It was interesting to see the similarities between Amanda Clark in the UNC staged version and the girl in the movie. Amanda also has fair skin and has a similar strawberry blonde hair color. With how Tracy Salter, cast the show it is crazy to see the resemblance some characters had to the movie. In ways, this diminishes the play, because the characters are so similar, however, in this case it enhances the play. People who have seen the movie version, and then see The Merchant of Venice staged will enjoy the show more, because the characters are similar and thus more relatable. Audience members may feel that they know the characters more, because of what they have seen before. The character of Launcelot Gobbo in the movie is diminished. He however, is enhanced on the stage. Greyson Lewis who plays Launcelot, is a tall, thin guy. Greyson is an amazing actor, and can physically become the actor. He also uses a different voice inflection to portray a character that is of lower class then the rest. Launcelot Gobbo in the staged performance is extremely remembered. He is so out there, that the audience grasps on to the unfamiliarity that is Greyson’s character. The character of Shylock was spectacular in both the movie and staged performance. In the movie, Al Pacino, played the role of Shylock and in the staged performance, Director of the School of Theatre Arts and Dance, David Grapes plays Shylock. Al Pacino portrayed the role of Shylock with commitment and passion. Watching him in the court scene was phenomenal, because it was so clear that all he cared about was furthering his business and gaining money. He does not even realize that his own daughter Jessica has left him to be with her true love. Even when he notices, he does not fight to make amends with her; he goes on to court trying to gain back what he lost financially. David Grapes portrays the character very well too. Not only with a physical walk that is different from his normal everyday walk, but he was mentally focused in the character. David Grapes and Al Pacino had a similar “look.” They both wore the red hats which at that time emphasized the fact the Shylock is Jewish. They also were similar in the way they spoke the lines. Of course, the script was the same, however, these two actors knew what Shylock overall desired, which made their characters in the way they were acting similar. Each actor enhances the character of Shylock in their own way.

The staging of The Merchant of Venice, is completely different. The movie is filmed and the UNC version is acted. The show at UNC takes place on one set, whereas the film version is clearly filmed in different locations. Shylocks house, Portia’s house, everything is seen, and in a way that enhances the script. Seeing the different settings for each character allows the audience to see the world that each character lives in. At the same time, one may think that the staged version diminishes the ability of seeing the different settings of the play. Some audience members may want to be given all the information, and not have to use their own imaginations, but that is what is needed when seeing a Shakespearian show live. Everything is enhanced in person, however, in this case there are things that worked and that did not work. The film version was more visually appealing then the staged version. Both have wonderful costumes that are appropriate to the period that both portray. The costumes done by Anne Toewe in the UNC performance were gorgeous and amazing. They were definitely enhanced seeing them in person versus on the screen. Seeing the different types of fabrics and the details that each costume possessed was outstanding, and consequently are diminished in the film. Michael Radford and Tracy Salter the directors of The Merchant of Venice obviously directed the shows differently, one was on stage and one was on film.

The Merchant of Venice, is a great show, and the University of Northern Colorado’s production of it is spectacular. The movie that was filmed in 2004, is also well done. The cast of the movie and the cast of the show did an amazing job. Memorizing and speaking Shakespeare is not always the easiest thing in the world. It takes a bit more time to become familiar with the language and feeling confident to speak. They did wonderfully and conveying to the audience the meaning of the language as well. If given the chance to see Shakespeare either on screen or in live theatre, take that opportunity. It is so rewarding.

Creativity in the Arts Speaker

Today, April 16, 2009, at 5pm, there was a Speaker that my class and I went to. My last blog entry was about sematics; the way people relate to things in inspring their imagination. Well, today, we heard a speaker talk about the same things.

Dr. Tania Zittoun, from Switzerland, Professor of Education came to UNC to give a speech of her theory. She is a Psychologist with a background in literature. She works as a Psychologist and in Education. Her speech was about: How Young people use cultural elements in their life or experiences in their trajectories.

She talked about social pyschology. A pyschology as a person, interacting with other objects; they all are in constant change. Imaginations, interactions, the way we interpret things. The meaning is very important; primacy of meaning processes.
Socially shared (meaning) <=> personally significant (sense)
AN example of this is: The room is different from you who come here everyday compared to me who is just speaking here once.

Dr. Zittoun says youth changing from childhood to adulthood is not a transition, but the youth are going through a period rich in transitions. Examples of this is school to work, leaving perents house, etc. We as humans go through life growing and changing. We have a routine, we understand our lives to a degree and if little things aren't quite normal we can deal with them to a degree. Well, Dr. Zittoun uses the word RUPTURE; something that challenges the daily routine, something like a good friend who moves far away. This rupture causes some changes. Life slowly goes on until there is anohter rupture, and we learn to adapt and get used to a new way of doing things again.

In my mind...I think of this at the UPS and DOWNS, the Rollercoater Ride that is life. There are different interpretations, but in the sense of Dr. Zittoun's study, a Rupture is what causes the challanges we as humans face.

She also discussed Symbolic resources; little punctrues of things that can affect us to change. Things like social, cultural, personal elements that are used to mediate psychological elements. Using something with intention links it to something else, giving the person a symbol of something. Listening to music after a hard day at the University or discussing about films with someone to know him or her better. These Symbolic resources are to give the youth in this case or any person for that matter the elements needed to understand something better.

The main point of her study is: ***Cultural elements used as symbolic resources can support youth transition processes (learning, identity, senses).***

She gave an example of this young girl Julia. Julia's grandma recently died and she recently also left home to go to University. The Manic Prechers (I think that's the full band's name) was a music group that Julia listened to quite frequently. The Manic Prechers helped Julia get through the transition of this change. They helped change her. She began to become more and mroe interested in the band and other bands with a simular sound, message, and lyrics that relate to how she was feeling. Julia also began to read books that this band may have particularly mentioned. She be gand to think about other things, but more importantly the world she lives in. AND, consequently with the music as her LINK through this transiton, it was used as the way she was able to understand everything.

I found this speaker very interesting. One...she had a French accent, so I was just listening to her accent, and as a theatre major was trying to mimic it slightly in my head...but once I GOT over the whole thing, and focused myself on the presentation at hand, I really understood what she was saying. It helped hearing it explained better then reading about it, like the the Torino article I discussed in my last blog entry. I realize that this theory is an interesting one. I never really thought about development in this way, and it was nice to see another view. It makes sense why we are the way we are. :)

Signs of Imagination :)

Thomas Turino from the University of Illinois at Urbana-Champaign, wrote this article on: Signs of Imagination, Identity, and Experience: A Peircian Semiotic Theory for Music.

I read it for my Creativity in the Arts class at UNC, however, it was a really long article, and I didn't want to print it off and waste trees and ink, so I read it online over the Library reserves, and wrote this blog on it.

Thomas, has in this article, laid out the components he believes provokes emotional musical composition. The process sounds very detailed and in depth.

"Semiosis involves a type of chaining process through time in which the
interpretant at one temporal stage becomes the sign for a new object at the
next stage of semiosis, creating a new interpretant which becomes the next
sign in the next instant, ad infinitum until that "train of thought" is interrupted
by another chain of thought, or by arriving at a belief or conclusion" (Torino 2).

Thomas, looks at other people and kind of discusses what they say as well, and it helps make his point = his research!! haha. The quote above is just saying that the process of interpreting the "chains" in the creative process is one way of arriving to a single thought...that could be used in a understanding the emotion of thought for the power of music.

To him, "Music involves signs of feeling and experience rather than the types of mediational signs that are about something else." In a way, I kind of agree. I mean, music is esentually feelings, otherwise people who listen to the music don't have "connections" to the songs. I believe that music is also experences...where he differs, because good songs come from real live experiences. I've always been told to write what I know, and in music...I believe that's what makes music emotional.

Thomas Torino's article, is very well written, and has a lot of research and examples to back up what he is saying. It sounds somewhat complicated at times, and to me, I feel that signs of imagination are different for every person. I don't think that there is a one way of preceieving things. His article was interesting...long...but interesting, and although I disagree on some things, it was a different view on imagination, and I liked seeing another interpretation.

My Musical Compostion!!!

I recently had the challenge of composing a musical piece. I took into consideration all the readings I've done lately on composing, and I tried to find something that inspired me.

The challenge? I had to write a composition in non-traditional notations, for at least four people, that lasted about 5-7 minutes. :)

I thought for a while, and I was listening to music, and memorizing lines for a one act, that I am currently rehearsing for, and it came to me. I remembered this one show I did in 2008. I looked at it and found the scene I did, and it happened to be the scene that at the time, we the cast, recorded. WE chose to record this scene (particularly written in the Laban Technique) so that we could express the words with movement instead of Acting them out. Laban has nine words that are involved in this technique: Flash, Flicker, Float, Wring, Dab, Burn, Press, Punch, and Slash. I decided to use the song that we made, combined with the song: Latika's Theme from the movie SLUMDOG MILLIONARE. :)

The concept of my composition was to convey this image of days where your life is out of control, and you feel that you can't control life and the things happening around you. Whether it be as simple as a lot of homework and projects are due to things like, your job is overwhelming, you've got taxes to file, and things to do for your family or friends that just seem to be crazy. Then the next song of Latika's Theme was to convey the calmness that FINALLY does arrive when life is done being overwhelming.

I then added things like a hole punch, a flash light, a nail polish bottle, a cell phone, a box of tick-tacks, and a vending machine case and prize to add more levels of sounds to the piece. WHAT I didn't take into consideration was that my sounds were all VERY SUBTLE, and with the music...didn't work as well as I wanted. SO, if I was to revamp the piece, I'd get things that made more noises.

In class, I presented it, and realized that I had a completely different thought when I was working on it. It seemed to sound better in my head, and even though I was working with the objects at home, in the class room it sounded all different. It's hard to explain, but I do wish I had used different objects.

The composition I did, was very hard for me to compose, this project was out of my comfort zone, but I hope I did okay. :) I feel like it went as well as it could, and I feel like I'm a lot more open to trying new things with composing music. I really enjoyed this project, however, hard for me...it was a lot of fun! :D

What to Listen for in the World

Music is a very facinating thing. "Music intrigates the mind and body in a unique manner which often surprises non-musicians." This is an interesting quote, because people who play an instrument are used to how to read music and how to go about interpreting music. Some people who don't play instruments or who are non-musicians may just look at what they are listening to just a nice melody or something. Music intrigates the mind and body by it provokes thought, feeling, and emotion. Music is sometimes surprising on how it truly does impact the listener.

Yo-Yo Ma plays the Cello. I think he as a composer is phenomenal. I am the type of person who loves listening to classical music, instrumental music, I, in general love listening to it all. I listen to all music...just not punk rock, hard metal, or hard core rap...haha, I love my music to have meanings, and the songs or instrumental pieces have to draw me in, in some way. I want to connect to the music I listen too. What I like about Yo-Yo Ma, is the fact that he does fully connect all the time. He has a style about him while he plays...(from what I see on youtube and things) that I like. He plays some music from SWAN LAKE a ballet, and I find it breath taking. I absolutely love the music and Swan Lake is one of my favorite ballets ever!

"The relationship among ideas, images, words, and music is great fun to explore, and musicians are very playful in this regard." THAT is very true!! It's so fun to "disect" music...see if the music pants a sort of image. I LOVE the music in Bambi. YES...the Disney movie bambi. Whenever I hear the music, EVEN IF it's not along with the movie, I see the meadows or I see how the rain falls on the leaves of trees. It's facinating, because everyone has a different image in their heads. Everyone connects differently to music.

"Music, the mystery I know best, is my guide to thinking about other ocmmon mysteries in the world." :D

*quotes came from the WHAT TO LISTEN FOR IN THE WORLD, excerpt I read for class.

The Art of Composing...PAUL ELWOOD style!!!

Today, I had the pleasure of listening to a guest speaker who came into my class, Creativity in the Arts. It was very interesting to me, because he does a lot of composing using a banjo. I always think of composers as people who compose for the piano or a violen. I just never thought that so much could be done with a banjo, and honestly...of COURSE it can be done.

Paul Elwood, was the speaker who came into class, and he played his banjo along with some other music he composed. It was so neat!!! I really enjoyed listening to the music...it was not the typical music you would hear. It was like, music that is more contemporary, a little abstract, but the sound was brilliant. I sat there listening to him, in amazement. It was fascination. He has a program on his computer that allows him to do most of the manipulation that he does in his music, but it's just so neat to hear! I felt that today, what he played, sounded a little middle eastern to me. Almost had a vibe of music that people in India listen to. It had a sense of...an urban feel. It's hard to explain, but the music he played, was very intriguing. I kept trying to listen to the music, to see if I could hear maybe objects he used that may not be instruments. I just found his music, and him as a speaker interesting. He said that composing music is a lot of work, that it is hard. He'd rather grade loads of papers then compose music. He said that it's a lot of work for him, but that a deadline helps him stay under control and focused to compose what he needs. It's just interesting.

The Composer and his Message

Composers. They are the great minds that form such music as Beethoven's Seventh Symphony. They are not always "prodegies." Everyone, can be a composer, they just need to be inspired to want to do something great.

Roger Sessions, wrote an article on THE COMPOSER AND HIS MESSAGE. It was really interesting. He says the essence of musical expression is EMOTION. "Emotion is specific, individual and conscious; music goes deeper then this, to the energies which animate our psychic life, and out of these creates a pattern which has an existence, laws, and human significance of it's own." This is a good point. Emotion is so deep and complicated in itself, that if we as people are aware of ourselves, and what we feel, then it's easily expressed.

He also says, "It must not be forgotten that, for the composer, notes, chords, melodic intervals - all the musical materials - are far more real, far more expressive, than words..." I relate to this. I believe it's true. Composers, create the music. If you watch a movie, there are composers who create music to go along with the actions of the actors on the screen. They are creating the music to enhance the movements and the characters themselves. Words are words, they mean a lot, that is true, however, at the same time, if there was not music, the words are just words. With music, the words are brought to life. They are given emotion, that which is so important to music and to composers.

"The composer, one must first think of him as living in a world of sounds, which in response to his creative impulse become animated with movement." Movement is also very important when composing. The movement of the music that is provoked by the sounds of the emotion, will express whether or not the song is up beat, steady, sad, happy, scary. Everything that is created will have a movement to it. How else do audience members, say they "connected" so well with a particular song or play or movie? They connect to the circumstances of the characters, actors, or in some cases, the way the music is presented. :)

INSPIRATION, is also important. Without inspiration, how is something truly created? "The inspiration may come in a flash, or as sometimes happens, it may grow and develop gradually." That is true...I playwright, and sometimes, my ideas hit me like a lightning bolt, at other times...they gradually lay quiet and gather in my journal, until at last they all fall into place as something that I can write about. "Inspiration, then, is the impulse which sets creating in movement: is is also the energy which keeps it going." EVERYTHING ties in together. Inspiration is the STYLE!

After a composer finds his or her emotion, inspiration, movement...after inspiration and conception comes EXECUTION. Putting it all together, into the grand masterpiece that is truly is, and truly will become.

MUSIC is so important to me...I can't go a day without my music. I listen to it all. Music helps me get through my day...I don't dwell on things, I am able to relax and stay focused. Music helps me forget my troubles. I find myself content and continuously happy, due to my music. I LOVE MUSIC!!!

The Lives of Others

Tonight, I met up with my class, and we watched a foreign film. We watched, THE LIVES OF OTHERS. It was really good! I was able to read a review of the movie before hand. It was in THE NEW YORKER. This review was written in 2007, but it was a good review. The author Anthony Lane wrote about the story line. It is essentually about Germans, who are controlling the society in which this movie takes place, 1984. It takes place in East Berlin. During this time, The Stasi - the state security service has been sneaking into homes and putting all the homes under survaillence. They are spying on the people who live in these homes, because the people are doing something suspicious that is causing them to be questioned by the secerity service. It's really interesting.

MY REVIEW:

I am very picky about foreign films. I love to watch them when I get the chance. I enjoy movies like: Crouching Tiger Hidden Dragon, Hero, House of Flying Daggers, Amale, and many others. It's sometimes hard to find a good film that is worth watching...sometimes foreign films don't have a good story line, or other times the acting in the movies are just horrible. NOT in this case. THE LIVES OF OTHERS is a great film, and was very well acted. I really liked Ulrich Muhe. He played a Stasi agent who spies on a playwright and his actress girlfriend. The playwright who is being spied on, because the security service believes that he is writing a play that is not allowed and that will cause much controversy.

I really enjoyed this film, because the story line was so accurate and detailed. There was conflict, stuggle between characters, and great character development. The Stasi agent who spies on the couple, is a great character. He truly does not want to do harm. I believe at first he does, because he is indeed doing his job, however, as the movies progresses, I see this transformation that occurs to him. He doesn't want to hurt anyone, and he falls in love with Christa the actress, in the sense that he realizes through her, that the people they are spying on are just like themself. They are pround people who love their home, culture, and are proud to be German. I think that he does what he does in the movie, to help secure the "true good" of Berlin. He is a corky guy, who as well "acts" his part, but may not truly believe what he has to do.

The whole movie was wonderful, I have no bad things to say. The directing was amazing! The story line didn't leave anyone out of the loop or guessing. Everything was very detailed, and in the end leaves the audience thinking.

I love movies that are thought provoking, and that give the audience something to think about and to discuss. We really start to think about how lucky we as humans, as Americans, have it. I give this film 4 stars! :)

IMPROV!!! :)

I have always loved Improv. I love watching Saturday Night Live and Who's Line is it Anyway, as well as the local improv troupes that are at school. When I was in High School, I had the honor of being on the school's improv troupe. We had to audition to have the chance to be on it, and I was lucky to have that chance. I loved it! A lot of my friends were on the troupe, and we were all experiencing the art of improv together. I tried three times, before I made it, and when I finally made it, I was so excited.

Well, in college, I've had the opportunity to take an improv class. I've taken the Improv class that is offered here at UNC twice. I find that improv is very beneficial to acting and to being able to think on my feet. I feel confident that if I find myself on stage in a show, and an actor misses a line, I feel that I am able to recover, and move on by using improv. Improv simply is a tool that can be used in case something happens.

In one of my classes, Creativity in the Arts, we were asked to write our own improv skits. Well...thinking about that, is difficult, I'm not used to having something "SCRIPTED". I'm used to just going up there, getting a relationship or environment and having to deal. It's up to you to fill in the gaps. :) WELL...the week of Feb. 23rd to the 27th, we played improv games in class, with the local UNC Improv Trouple CHAOS. I had the pleasure of working with ERIC RITTER, on of Chaos' members in high school. That's right...he went to my high school and he was in the same improv troupe as me. Well, he was heading up this weeks "WORKSHOP" so, I was able to see him again and work on improv and getting better.

WHAT I LEARNED:

1) Don't ask questions
2) Always agree
3) Follow C.O.R.E (Character, Obejective, Relationship, and Environment)

MY CLASS IMPROV SKIT:

The environment is at a Hospital. The characters are Doctors who are rivals. The objective that I WANT is: I want to take over the hospital (which can also be my secret). The relationship is that we start out as rival enmies and we end up as happy colligues. The jist of my skit with my friend Andrea Romano, is that we are rivals...we go way back to college. I know that she's stolen my cure for restless leg syndrome, and that I know she cheated on her medical exams. She however, knows that I've stolen her husband and she has filled my room with Enema Balls. WE work on a patient discovering that the particular patient has jewels and a map in her stomach. The map leads to the Holy Grail. I end up telling her my plans, and we end up putting things aside and working together.

Other ideas can also be a patient/doctor or a girl who is affraid of the doctor. WE HAVE many ideas...and have quite a few to choose from for the day that we present our "skits" in class.

Improv is fun, and not mean to be taken so seriously. YES, remember the key "rules" but ultimately...you must just have fun!!! :)

I LOVE IMPROV!!! :D

My Creative Style <3 ~Composition of Movement

Movement is the way we as humans communicate. We communicate through our body language. Everyone has a different way of expressing movement. Mary Wigman, author of a article I read called, COMPOSITION IN PURE MOVEMENT, said, "...the fundamental idea of any creation arises in me or, rather out of me as a completely independent dance theme."

I agree. I love dance, and I myself have danced since I was three and a half years old. I love how dance is so passionate, expressive, and powerful. There are so many different styles too, which I absolutely love seeing. I am in History of Theatre Two, and last semester, we learned about all the countries and theatre in those countries. Well, Africa, was one of the most interesting to me. Their style of dance, is so different, but it was their way of passing on the culture and history of their heritage.

Mary Wigman, also says, "Neitehr is my dancing abstact, in intention at any rate, for its origin is not in the mind. If there is an abstract effect it is incidental. On the other hand my purpose is not to "interpret" the emotions. Grief, joy, fear, are terms too fixed and static to describe the sources of my work." This is interesting. I feel like FOR ME, I'm the opposite. I very much dance the emotions and interpret through music how I feel. I dance how I feel. Yes, my dance isn't abstract either, but that doesn't mean I don't know how to dance abstractly. I think it's fun, to just dance different...using Modern dance or hip-hop, even jazz and ballet, tap! Dance is dance, it's an expressive form of movement.

DANCE IS MUSIC MADE VISIBLE!!! :)

I have studied a little of the LABAN system. It's so interesting...I worked on this show called, "4.48 Psychosis" and it was all about using repetative motions to express oneself. It's kind of abstract, at least the way I did it. It's a fun system or style to play around and experience with.

Mary also says, "Creative work will always assume new and varying forms." That is very true!!! Creative work is never a right or wrong way to a process of something. It's always changing, and morphing into something else. That's what I really enjoy. When I worked on 4.48 Psychosis, it was a total experience. WE were working with such an intense, abstract script! It was the suicide note of the playwright Sara Kane who wrote it. It was insane, and such a great experience; although hard and very dramatic, I learned a lot, and my composition of movement improved too! In the script, there were scenes where I HAD to come up with my own dance or movements to express the scene at hand. It always changed, I kept things I liked, and tossed things I didn't like. It was a process, but it was always changing.

It was a great experience...working on that show. I find that I'm more expressive now, and I am less scared to attempt to form my own dance piece. It's just great. :)

My Collage and the Abstractiveness of IT!!!

I absolutely love making collages. They're so expressive and relaxing. I enjoy cutting out the tiny pieces from magazines or little odds and ins that I find from old photographs or pieces of cloth, anything to help me form an "image" that I find represents me. :)

In everyday life, I take a lot of photos. I photograph everything! I do Creative Memories Scrap Booking with my mom, on a normal basis. It's our Mother Daughter time, to spend together. I started scrap booking at the age of nine. I am 21 years old, and am working on book number 24. Granted...a lot of those books are like 7x7 size, but I scrap book everything of importance to me. That's why when in my Creativity in the Arts class, when we were asked to make a collage, I found it amazingly fun. I love being creative, and collages are just another way of doing just that.



This is my original collage. My favorite female artist is Natasha Bedingfield. I love itunes, I go to UNC. My favorite Vitamin Water is the "Balance" flavor. I love what it says on the tag...more then anything. It's funny. I just love being creative, and I'm a total girlie girl. I have fortunes scattered around, because they were the ones that meant the most to me. One like, "Good things will come to you in due time" or "Courage lies with in each of us." I also am an actor, so I have a ticket of a show that my High School did. I also am an Aquarius. So...I've got some things on there that represent that. I also took this personality test of which Disney Princess I am, and I am Jasmine. That's why she's on there too. This collage, is totally me, in real life. I live to be happy!!! My friend Kayla Berkey, says, "Life is to short to not be lived happy." And...I have to agree. :)



This is a portion of my collage that I made abstract. It's supposed to be vertical with the UNC on the left, but I don't know how to rotate it, in here...so, that's okay. It just adds more to it. Anyway, I like this abstract image of my collage, because it's more bold and crazy! The letters of the words and praises are enhanced more, but at the same time, you have to really LOOK to see, the praise "THE LOOK." I think that this is a fun enhancement of my collage in the sense that it's blends what is there, with what should be there. You have to see it, and pay attention to what's like...infront of you. It's interesting like that. I just think it's really neat to see.



This is the other abstraction I have of my collage. I like this one a lot too, because it's the complete oposite of the one before it. This one is more subtle, and relaxed. It's less crazy. The colors are more dry, I almost want to say. I like both abstractions equally, but this one is almost more of a favorite of mine. JUST because, in general, I'm partial to pastels more then I am bold colors, and this one makes me think of pastels. I also like how this one looks more ventage. I love things that look old and tattered, and this almost looks like it's just been distressed. I love how certain things are more enhanced then others. It's just really neat to look at.

I could have played around on the editing program all day. But...of course we only had a little bit of time, a full class hour, and so...this was all I got done. :) It's still pretty cool, and I still really like it. I hope you do too!!! AND I hope that now you go out and make a collage of your own!!! :)

The Creative Process

Everyone has their own Creative process.

"The picture is not thought out and determined beforehand, rather while it is being made it follows the mobility of thought. Finished, it changes further, according to the condition of him who looks at it. A picture lives its life like a living creature, undergoing the changes that daily life imposes upon us. That is natural, since a picture lives only through him who looks at it."

This quote is in, CONVERSATIONS WITH PICASSO by Christian Zervos. I really liked this excerpt, because it expresses that art is not planned. Sometimes you never know what will spark the interest or inspiration to create the painting that will soon be a masterpiece. A painting, is just something that appears out of the spur of the moment. A paining expresses something, just like every living organism in our society strives to express something. I liked this quote, because I agree with it completely 100%. Yes, the artist has his own thought of what the paining is supposed to represent, but just like a play being performed, each audience member either gets a completely different message...or the entire audience gets reletively the same message. That's how it is with paintings.

"The artist is a receptacle of emotions come from no matter where: from the sky, the earth, a piece of paper, a passing figure, a cobweb. This is why one must not discriminate between things. There is no rank among them. One must take one's good where one finds it, except in one's own works. I have a horror of copying myself, but I have no hesitation, when I am shown for example a portfolio of old drawings, in taking from them whatever I want."

This quote also stuck out to me from the same reading. It is saying that we as human beings gain emotions from everything around us. It is up to us not to rank them into what is the best idea or not the best idea. We are supposed to take what's good from what we find and then use that in our works of art. Picasso also goes on to say in this article that he has no hesitation to take ideas from old drawings. Those were his old ideas, and even though they may not have worked at the time, they work now, and there's always going to be a moment where something you thought would never work out...always does. It's just so interesting. That's why I, as an actor carries around a little journal all the time. If I see something that strikes me...I will write it down. You never know when it's that little piece of information that influences a character you're acting or a play you're writing.

"A picture lives with the life you put into it. If you put no life into it - no thrill, no concentration of delight or exaltation of visual discovery - then the picture is dead, like so many canvases, no matter how much thorough and scientific work is put into it."

This is so true!!! This quote was said by D.H. Lawrence on MAKING PICTURES. I believe this to be true too. When something is being created, it is being brought to life. Just like I think that DANCE IS MUSIC MADE VISIBLE. Painting a picture is bring life to something. :)

ONE line in this article that stood out to me was, "The conscious delight is certainly stronger in paint." I think this is well put. When a we dream as humans, it's techniquely our conscious selves that shoot snap shots of pictures in our minds during REM sleep. Our brain then takes those snap shots and fills in the blanks to give us what we know as a "dream." It's our consciousness that truly wants to be seen. It's the other side of us waiting to jump out!! I strongly feel that this quote is true. He then goes on to say, "I believe many people have, in their consciousness, living images that woudl give them the greatest joy to bring out. But they don't know how to go about it. And teaching only hinders them." DID I just say that we as humans have another side to us wating to jump out?! haha...he said the same thing. However, I don't agree fully, with "teaching only hinders them." I think that this can be a yes true, and a no false statement. I believe that there are people who can teach you and enhance your ability in your own creative process. That goes both ways.

Everyone has their own creative process, and they are all simular, we just need to find what works for us. :)

Art in Education

I believe that Creativity can be taught, but it's also something that can be discovered. I have been exposed to art my whole life: dancing at the age of three, playing the piano at seven. I love knitting and corcheting and I love to quilt. I love being expressive, and that's why I am a theatre major. I find the arts a very facinating field of interest. I was also lucky that growing up in school, arts was always offered to me.

Now-a-days, things are different. It's so hard to get kids interested in the arts, when TV is so dominant; as well as video games. I used to baby-sit when I was in high school, and all the kids wanted to do was play video games or watch TV. I think that being exposed to the arts is very important. TODAY, in schools, what is the first thing to go when budget cuts happen??? THE ARTS!!! Music, band, drama, art...everything! GOES! I can't explain how upset that makes me. I went to middle school at Deer Creek Middle School. When I was there, I was involved in Drama, Choir. I was also in Honors Choir and the school shows (one). It was such a great experience to be able to have. NOW, that same school, HAS NOTHING! It's upsetting, my high school teacher goes over to Deer Creek and has an after school "club" that is Choir. Even that though, is on her own time...and does not have much interest. BECAUSE, the arts are out of some schools, students have no extracurricular activity to be involved in, and consequently...could possibly fall into the "wrong" crowd.

Growing up, I was involved in Girl Scouts. I started in Kindergarten as a Daisy Scout, and I went into Brownies, then Juniors, then Cadets, and then finally Senior Girl Scouts. I went through it all. I received my Silver Award (WHICH they now have a Bronze Award for Juniors) and my GOLD AWARD!!! WHICH ONLY 4% of all Girl Scouts ever receive. The Gold Award is the Eagle Scout Award for Boy Scouts, but can be thought as harder to get...the Gold Award, because we have a VERY LONG and grueling process that we have to go through, plus a lot of prerequisites that we have to complete first. Essentially, my Gold Award took me TWO years to complete.

What did I do??? I introduced the ARTS to Pre-School Children. For one month I worked with four and five year olds, at Englewood United Methodist Church. I wrote a script, and worked with the kids on rehearsing it to make it into a production. We made costumes, sets, and in the end...because so many were leaving to head to Kindergarten, WE ended up making a MOVIE!!! We made the play into a movie!! The kids had so much fun!!! It was so rewarding to see them have fun with the arts!!! Introducing them to something that they may or may not have been exposed to yet. I was awakening the creativity in them, and hopefully, now that they are all...in third grade....I HOPE that they are able to have the experience in the arts that I had growing up.

I read this article, and it's about creativity in the place of education. Looking at my school, I am in a Liberal Arts College. I like the education I am receiving. I have the choice to choose what classes I want to do, and I have the choice of what professor I'd like to have...(at least for some classes). I feel that being at a Liberal Arts College, although education is important, I feel like the environment I am in, is more relaxed. I feel less pressure on the classes, I myself know the importance, but I don't feel like it's the most important thing in the world. What's important is doing what you need to do, to get where you want to get in your life. Education is just one part of it. My cousins Candice and Jessica both went/go to "Ivy League" schools. Candice went to Vanderbelt University, and my cousin Jessica is a Junior at Duke. They are getting a college education just like me. It doesn't matter what the name is, it's all about what's best for you.

Creativity is important, I just believe it gives everyone an enhanced life. It adds new experiences to life...and life is worth living to the fullest. I just think that a creative education is important.

Orchestra Concert!!!

Music is really important in my life. I am always listening to music as I walk around school, or I'm driving in the car. I especially love to drive around town, during the summer with my windows rolled down blasting music (tastefully of course).

Music is expressed in so many ways: band, orchestra, ballet, musicals, and everyday life...musical groups and composers. When I was 12 years old, I went down to Branson, Missouri with my mom, grandma, and church. I saw Soji Tabouchi perform at his amazing theatre, his Violin. He was spectacular, he could play the violin with it behind his head and back!!! It was an amazing show.

At the University of Northern Colorado, we have an amazing music program. I've got many friends who I know are vocal majors, or are majoring in musical composition. Everyone at this school is so talented. Tonight, February 9, 2009, I went to the Union Colony Civic Center (UCCC) to see the UNC Symphony Orchestra perform. They were spectacular.

There were three parts to tonight's program.

THE FIRST:

The first performance was focused on pianos. The two people who played were Lei Weng and Jonathan Bellman. The two of them sat across from each other each at their on grand piano, and they played together as the orchestra accompanied them. It was so neat to see. Each pianist had their own style. Jonathan was more relaxed as he played. He played very focused and relaxed. It was interesting to see them both play. I personally gravitated towards watching Lei Weng play more. I loved his style. He was so passionate as he played. He was really active as well. He played with the music, flowing each hand movement with another. It was like watching a painter paint each stroke as it flowed into another painting at last a masterpiece. I was watching him play, wishing I had continued playing. I started to play the piano when I was seven years old. I was being taught by a close family friend. Donna Dunkle, taught me for like five years, and then she quit doing lessons, because she needed to spend more time with her family. I was learning with her, how to play mostly by ear, and then when I changed to the new piano teacher, I had a rude awakening. She wanted me to play only with music. I didn't like her much, and instead of getting better I got worse. I finally found a great teacher who had a great balance between ear and sight training, but then college came, and here I am. As I sat and watched the first performance, I couldn't help but feel my mind painting a picture of what the music really truly was saying...to me.

THE SECOND:

The second performance was also really neat! A Sophomore girl, named Natalie Padilla, was the soloist for this number. She was amazing!!! I was just in awe at her performance. She was playing a Concerto that hasn't been performed since 1890. It was written, piece by piece, and then when the last bit was added, it was disliked by many...because "it didn't flow or fit" WELL...finally that has changed. Tonight, we the audience had the pleasure to see it performed. Natalie, had won a Concerto competition in her Freshman year, and so this year, she was given this opportunity! She was the first Freshman to ever win the competition!!! She is amazing, I was watching her play her violin and I could not believe it. Some parts of the concerto was incredibly fast and it was just exciting to see her play so quickly, and manipulate the violin to play the higher notes when needed. Natalie did something that I liked in Lei Weng. I liked that she too moved with the music. She played and you could see the passion and the excitement she has. You can tell that playing the violin is really important to her, and the way she played was expressed even more with how she let the music itself affect her. That's how I feel about dancing. I love to dance, letting the music and the movement over take me, and I like to dance with passion. It's hard in classes...but once it's rehearsals, it's much easier to just dance in the moment. I feel that that's what she was doing, playing in the moment, and living in the moment. The concerto was so beautiful, and it was such a treat to see her as the soloist. I KNOW that she's going to have a spectacular future with whatever she decides to do.

THE THIRD:

The last performance we saw this evening was Symphony No. 8 in G Major, Op. 88 by Antonin Dvorak. This symphony was very alive. It had it's subtle, calm, and quiet moments, but it was also very loud and dominating. I was just enjoying the music, looking at everyone playing, when a question hit me. There was no on on the stage playing left handed. Like...Everyone held the violin with their left hands and then used the bow with their right hands. My question was "What about those who are left handed? Do they have to learn to play right handed like that?" It was a weird thought, but watching the violinists I remembered, my good friend, Lauren Carpenter who played the violin. She was in Orchestra starting in Elementary School...then Middle School, and into High School. I remember she was opposite from everyone...but then again I could have just made that up. I was curious...because even everyone on the Cellos used the bow in their right hands. YES, it gave a very uniformed look, but at the same time, I just wondered. :) In this last performance of the UNC Symphony Orchestra, I noticed it the MOST, how even the whole Orchestra ITSELF becomes one. They were moving with the music, all together! They were playing and it was just so neat to see! They were ALL TOGETHER! I realize that that's very important with performing music like they do, just like dance. You need everyone to dance in unison otherwise it looks weird and off. I just was fascinated at watching them playing and seeing everything down to the last string of the bow in unison. I did this activity in my Improv class last semester, where we (actors) walked around the room. We just walked and moved with a purpose, but we HAD to stop together. WE as a class had to read each other to figure out when the moment was that we were all going to stop. It was really neat! We then did it in smaller groups, and we walked around in a circle, and had to stop as a group, we did the same with running. It was fascinating to see it WORK!!! Watching the orchestra play like that, reminded me of the class.

The whole night was such a joy to get to see! I haven't gotten to go to the Symphony since I was in 5th grade. I am more inclined to go to the ballet, but this was enjoyable. It was so neat to see familiar faces of people that I've seen around Frasier (The college of Performing and Visual Arts building) and campus. I had a great time tonight, and know that I will probably see another Symphony in the future!!!

Creations on Creating

Creators on Creating. This article is on Awakening and Cultivating the Imaginative Mind. In this article, Peter Ilich Tchaikovsky has three excepts of letters that he wrote on his creative process. It's very interesting to see.

He is asked on how he composes a symphony...if he has a special program in view. He says that, that's a hard question to answer.

This is like asking an actor, if they have a specific way that they play a character. AND in some cases an actor does. They are the type of character who just reacts what he has rehearsed. A good actor, is someone who uses his talents, knowledge of the playwrights intents, the overall storyline, he takes in to consideration all the components to form the right character. WHICH should change nightly, depending on the reactions of his fellow actors that night, and the reactions of the audience. There is no specific program or idea in mind. It just sort of develops.

Tchaikovsky says, "Even in the works of the greatest master we find such moments, when the organic sequence fails and a skillful join has to be made, so that parts appear as a completely welded whole." This is interesting, in the sense, that just like in live theatre there are moments where a fellow actor may jump a line or miss an entrance and you have to work as a team to overcome the speed bump and move on. Tchaikovsky says a lot of things that really make a lot of sense. "The only music capable of moving and touching us is that which flows from the deapth of a composer's soul when he is stirred by inspiration. There is no doubt that even the greatest musical geniuses have sometimes worked without inspiration." It is facinating to watch a mater at their work...so to speak. When I am passionate about a certain character I am portraying, or a specific play that I am writting, I realize that I have a lot os inspiration for what I am doing. Some of the most memorable symphanies are brought on by some sort of passion and inspirtaion moment. When I watch Swan Lake; the Ballet or the Nutcracker, also a Ballet, you always hear those CLASSIC musical pieces that are danced to on stage. Without those classic songs, it's just a ballet, but those instead were brought on by some sort of inspiration and in the end made a ballet that won't ever be forgotten. Although, there are moments where there is no inspirtaion or I like to think of writers block, things can still be formed. There are always going to be hard moments when composing ANYTHING, and in the end...you need to be "NATUALLY PATIENT." Everything comes in the right time.

Everything is written for a reason. In the play, The Elephant Man, the playwright specifically says to not put the actor playing John Merrick in any kind of Prostetics. He wants the actor to portray the Elephant Man, by just imitating the body stance and voice...he doesn't want to audience to see this "grusome" character. HE wants them to paint their own image of what the Elephant Man truly looked like. In the movie, David Lynch, ignored all of the "wishes" and placed the Elephant Man in all kinds of make-up and prostetics. In the end...it just wasn't the same. That's like saying if, "it were played with the bow, it would lose all it's charm and be a mere body without a soul..." In composition, everything is written for a SOUL purpose.

The "gifts" for composing a symphany in his eyes, "have yet reached their ultimate development." He is saying that an artists talents don't ever die. You really never stop learning. As an actor and an artist, you continually have to be open to things around you. You are never done learning how to act or how to compose. There are always going to be things that impact you, things that you feel will inspire you, and if you think that you have reached your peak, then you haven't truly learned. It is said that, some of the "super star actors" still bring acting coaches with them on sets of movies, to help them find even more inspiration, then they already have for the paticular character that they are conveying. It's just really interesting that everyone has their own way of doing things.

Education and the World we Make It

Education is a component to life. Children are put into school at young ages, and are expected to be in school until they are at least 22 years old. I think back on my schooling, and it's been 19 years already. I was put into pre-school at age 2, and now I'm 21, and in college. It's insane how much our society puts on us as America to get an education.

I see that it is important. I mean, with out a solid education what kind of job are you going to be able to get? At least...that is the thoughts of most parents today. I read this article about the uses of liberal education; like what education is seen as, and then how people who may not be able to afford much survive.

In the classroom, a teacher has a lot of responsibilities. They have to teach a classroom of students information that is one: needed for the class, two: possibly needed for a career path, and three: they are possibly teaching a skill that is meant to progress the lives of the individuals. A teacher has a tough job, because they have to keep the students drawn in to the discussion in hopes that the student will learn something and not want to let the droll collect on their desk, because they've fallen asleep. I know...being a student is hard too. You've got to place aside all the trials and tribulations that you are experiencing in your life, long enough to get something out of the class. It's important for us as students to do well in classes, because we may need a good grade in this particular class so that we may be able to get into a program: nursing or teaching, etc.

The article I read mentioned different types of students. The person who wrote is says, "Whether the students are sorority/fraternity types, grunge aficionados, piercer/tattooers, black or white, rich or middle class....On good days they display a light, appealing glow; on bad days, shuffling disgruntlement. But there's little fire, little passion to be found." I think that this is saying that no matter the generation, race, or society class...all students are going to have good and bad days in class. Days where it's like just amazing, and everyone got everything and days where it's like pulling teeth. As I continued to read the article it asks what influences students to lose passion, and the answer? They blame it on the 100 plus channels that are on the TV today. They blame it on the numerous Blockbuster outlets, shopping centers, etc. Thinking about that, I see that those are very plausible reasons. I know that if I have a day, where I am just no enthusiastic to HAVE to go to class, I'm tired all day, and all I want to do is sleep, watch TV, eat junk food, and be lazy.

The author then talks about when he goes to other schools, it not any different then his own school. He runs into the same things. "When I visit other schools to lecture, I see a similar scene unfolding. There are of course, terrific students everywhere. And they're all the better for the way they've had to strive against the existing conformity." AND that is completely true. One, yes of course, you'll find the same things at the different schools, but in a way education is a mandatory act that everyone has to do. As much as we as a society try not to conform to the societal means...there's never a way to escape it. It's always going to be there following you. "But overall, the students strike me as being sweet and sad, hovering in a nearly suspended animation." WE as students are suspended in air until we achieve what is needed of us.

There is always a question asked: What about those who can't afford an education? It's the people who are "poor" or "jobless" even "homeless." YES, there are ways of figuring things out, and you're able to somehow get an education, but poverty in America is also an important issue. Sometimes, there are children in at risk families...and these are the children who will be lucky if they even finish high school. Where I am from, about 25 minutes from my house is another city. This city is where I go to church, and where I have gone to church my whole life. This city is also where, there is a high level of high risk families. It may be that a parent is in jail or a family has enough money to place their children in day care to make sure they are safe, but not enough money to provide Christmas presents or a solid home, because they may not have the money to pay the bills. With today's economic issues...it's easy to see what our communities can come to.

In the second part of the article, to me, i saw that the author was reaching out to the at risk communities and were trying to get them to see that they want to strive for a different life. "You've been cheated. Rich people learn the humanities; you didn't. The humanities are a foundation for getting along in the world, for thinking, for learning to reflect on the world instead of just reacting to whatever force is turned against you. I think the humanities are one of the ways to become political, and I don't mean political in the sense of voting in an election but in the broad sense." THIS quote explains that the author feels that without a good education in certain standards, that people are unable to fully know how to live a good life. Someone may be to scared to speak their mind, but if they are educated then they will be able to speak their mind and be able to live a prosperous life. "If you want real power, legitimate power, the kind that comes from the people and belongs to the people, you must understand politics. The humanities will help." THIS IS SO TRUE, plain and simple. Basically, this articles shows that anyone and everyone can get an education, and with that education they will succeed. The person just has to want it.

We Become Our Names

Born for Stardom

Some people are born to be teachers, others are born to be doctors, and once in a while some special person is born to be our country’s Commander in Chief. I was born for stardom.

It all started at the age of three and a half. My mom put me into dance class in the hopes that I’d socialize with other kids my age. I’m an only child, and my parents were determined to teach me independence; not to expect to be handed life on a silver platter. I would say they succeeded. I am independent and very social. I had to work for things that I wanted. They were not ever given to me.

I realized that I was meant for stardom after 15 years of dance recitals and choir concerts. I realized that being in the movies, working in film and television was for me when I found out how I got my name: Jennifer Lynn So. I am named Jennifer after my dad’s favorite actress, Jennifer O’Neill. The name “Lynn” was given by my mother, after her own middle name. My last name embodies my half-Chinese heritage, of which I am proud.

When I was just six years old, I played the role of a reporter for a church function. It was the annual Christmas show, and I was interviewing Prince Charles. At that moment, I realized that I liked acting. In elementary school and middle school, I was more involved with theatre. It was an exciting activity for me, and something I loved. That passion continued to grow. By the time I reached college, I knew that I wanted a career in Film and Television.

I strongly believe that you become your name, and there have been many events over the course of my life, that have shown me that I am meant to be doing what I am doing. A persons name is their identity. My friend Rachel has a cat named, Sassy, and she tells me that Sassy gets even sassier as she grows. Names in the Chinese culture within a family have similarities. In the Chinese culture, your name is opposite that of America; your last name goes first and then your first name follows. My Chinese name is, So Tin Mei, which means Heavenly Beauty. The similarities I am talking about within a family are interesting. In my family all of my cousins, who are all girls, have a similar start to our names. We all start with So Tin, but then the ends of our names are different. My cousin Jessica is, So Tin Mun and my cousin Kyna is, So Tin Wai.

My Grandparents, on my dad’s side, gave me my Chinese name. When I was eight years old, I went back to Hong Kong with my parents for Christmas. I remember I was at my cousin Kyna’s apartment, and everyone was sitting out enjoying some Jasmine Tea after dinner, discussing what my name should be.

It was like a debate, everyone was sharing their thoughts and opinions, but it was not until my cousin Kyna said, “How about So Tin Mei,” did the discussion end.

“So Tin Mei,” said my Dad. “I really like it.”

My dad then thought about the name, and decided that it was perfect for me.

We become our names. I have met Will Smith, and I have seen Adam Rodriguez, Kal Penn, and Eva Longoria. It was 2008, and one of the biggest Presidential elections was underway. I saw Adam, Kal, and Eva at a rally speaking for Obama. At the time, I had no idea who I was going to vote for, but I was listening to everyone and their sides of things, so that I may finalize my choice. About a month later, Will Smith was in Denver, promoting his movie, “Seven Pounds” and my friends and I drove down to where the event was being held, and we were able to see him. A couple of my friends drove down earlier, and were able to get free passes to see the movie; I on the other hand got down there later with my friend Sue, and we were unable to see the movie. However, we did get a picture taken with Will Smith, as well as an autograph. I realized in those two moments, where the glance of this other world was in sight, that I knew my dreams were going to come true. It was a strange feeling deep within my heart. It was a strong sense that I am on the right path.

I am determined to make it in film and television, and it is events like the rally, the promoting of the movie, and the fact that I’m named after an actress; that I embrace to help me succeed. I am becoming my name, an actress. Each component of a name builds you as a person. Each part of your name represents importance. It’s just up to you to discover who you are meant to be.

*LATE AT NIGHT* My Pantoum Poem...

Before I write my Pantoum poem, I want to tell you the past life of my poem. I am...as of this early Sunday morning, including today, five days until my 21st birthday. I turn 21 on the 29th of January, and I am really excited! My cousin Jessica turns 21 on the 26th of January...three days before me. We both have lived a couple years longer then a cousin of ours. My cousin Ronald, was a year older then us. He graduated high school, from the Hong Kong International School in Hong Kong, in 2005. A couple months after he graduated he was diagnosed with Acute Lymphoma Leukemia. It was hard to deal with, because I'm here in the USA, and he's over in China...and I wanted to be there with him, but I couldn't. Well, he went into remission in June of 2006, and we thought he was in the clear. Well, Christmas of 2006, I was supposed to go back to Hong Kong to visit family...however, the weather decided to be all psycho, and snow with back to back Blizzards. So, needless to say the trip was off. I was so angry! Because in February of 2007, the Leukemia came back...and that time, he didn't make it. I couldn't even go to the funeral, because classes at school (with my major) weren't helping me. They were going to drop me from a class or lower my grade...and my parents didn't want my grades to suffer...even though I didn't care if they did or not. I was angry and upset for a long time...I had an incredibly hard time coming to terms with what happened. My cousin Ronald was so young! And...although I only saw him every two years, I AM still very close to my family in Hong Kong.

I had a dream one night...that I was at his funeral, and I was crying hysterically. My family in my dream was trying to get me out of the church and they were trying to calm me down, but I was flinging them away...I didn't want to leave, I didn't want the help. I remember thinking in the dream that this is a dream and that I needed to wake up, but I was stuck. I realized that life is short. We can't live it just being scared all the time, we need to live it with happiness and love, we need friends and family, and we need to live like today is our last.

To get over everything...I wrote a play, and started to write a song on the piano, and now...I have written this poem. BECAUSE...without the walks I took at night...I would not have been able to feel cleansed and at peace with everything. Walking at night...by myself with my thoughts, helped me to see...that my cousin is at peace, and that he is safe, not in pain, and happy. So...here is my poem:

*LATE AT NIGHT*

Stars are enchanted dreams.
They shine with love and beauty.
The night sky is filled with a quiet melody.
The moon brings hope, peace, joy.

They shine with love and beauty.
Dancing across the sky like happiness.
The moon brings hope, peace, joy.
Shooting stars soar like life passing by.

Dancing across the sky like happiness.
Fresh crisp air wiping away my tears.
Shooting stars soar like life passing you by.
No more laughs for him.

Fresh crisp air wiping away my tears.
Walking late at night helps me heal.
No more laughs for him.
He shines from Heaven now.

Walking late at night helps me heal.
I'm feeling happier with every dawn.
He shines from Heaven now.
I will see him again one day.

I'm feeling happier with every dawn.
The night sky is filled with a quiet melody.
I will see him again one day.
Stars are enchanted dreams.



The first picture is of me and my cousins this last Christmas of 2009. The second picture is a picture of my cousins Christmas of 2006, the one I was unable to make. My cousin Ronald is the one on the far left.

*Love* J.So

Sweet Art Exhibits!!!

I absolutely love art galleries, exhibits, museums...I love to look at an art piece and try to find my own meanings. The summer of 2007, I went to New York for one month. I did a summer program at the now, Dramtic Conservatory for the Arts, School for Film and Television. It was a one month summer intensive program on Commercial Study, Scene Study for Film and Television, Shakespeare, Stage Combat, Michael Chekhov Acting Technique, and Voice Overs. Well, although class were like a normal job 9-6pm, it was an amazing program, and I now know that ultimately it's film and television that I want to do with my life.

I'm digressing though..haha, what I want to say, is that on weekends I spent it exploring around the city. One weekend I went to the METROPOLITAN ART MUSEUM. I spent like the majority of the day there!!! I just went and looked at everything! They had art from every era. I loved the contemporary art exhibit. I love looking at modern art. I just...really enjoy things that you have to figure out. Like, one of my most favorite plays is, WAITING FOR GODOT, by Samuel Beckket. That play is quite interesting. Two people are waiting for Godot, but you never actually see him...he doesn't ever show up. It's just a play about the day by day same way of life, the same mundane activities to pass time...hoping that it's the day he shows up.

At the University of Northern Colorado where I am currently a student, there are a couple galleries that show off the artwork of local artists, but mostly students artwork. TODAY there are two exhibits that I actually went to see.

THE FIRST ONE:

GENE HOFFMAN "Pick of Litter"

The artwork in the gallary was amazing. The pieces seemed to be all made out of plastic, metal, wood. The way they all turned out were just amazing. There was one that I really enjoyed and it was called, "Plastic Indian Spirit" made entirely of plastic. IT was very intricate. Made of bright bold colors; it's really neat how there is so much pieced together in it. All the pieces are very well done. I am amazed how evertying is so detailed and made out of something so minimal, yet it all looks so amazing! My favorite piece in this exhibit was the OGRE WHO ATE CLOCKS, made out of wood, metal, and plastic. It was an actual grandfather clock style with what almost looks like a dragon in it. It was very neat looking, because at the same time, it was like the grandfather clock was his body, and the inside workings of a clock was the insides of the Ogre. It was just really cool.

THE SECOND ONE:

The students whose artwork was in this exhibit was encouraged to look for ordinary and unusual materials and combine in ways that could produce unexpected results. Some pieces are a clear idea others are expressed in a different way. They are collected to dictate the direction the piece took. People need to be open to many meanings. This was a very neat exhibit. Some objects combined nature with technology. Others were formed out of all things that were found. One piece that stood out to me was a blue foot locker filled with plastic tags all numbered and all sorts of numbers, and in the middle of the box was a skull of a cow or some animal. To me it represented all the cattle that are killed daily for food and other things. Another piece that I thought was really cool, was a windmill that was made out of a floor heater and wood. In the middle of the windmill and the base that was the old floor heater was a red knob. It was one of those knobs that you have outside on the side of your house that controls how much water is let out at a time through the hose so that you can water your yards. It was interesting to see the concept that the artist took. It was just an amazing gallery.

Every month there are new exhibits that open in the two galleries that are at my school. I enjoy walking through them, because they're usually really neat concepts and the artwork is stuff that I would never think of developing. It's just great...but I think that I also enjoy it so much, because I myself am an artist...theatre...film, I enjoy the arts! ANYTHING AND EVERYTHING!!!

Poetry...you needn't be worried...

I have always loved poetry. I guess it's because I grew up reading poetry books like, FALLING UP, THE LIGHT IN THE ATTIC, THE GIVING TREE, and WHERE THE SIDEWALK ENDS, by Shel Siverstein. I enjoyed reading the poems in those books. The poems were presented in a way that for children was enjoyable. Each poem had a picture with it, and the poems were always so funny and the most outragious scenarios.

According to Dictionary.com poetry is defined as: the art of rhythmical composition, written or spoken, for exciting pleasure by beautiful, imaginative, or elevated thoughts.

In my Creativity in the Arts class, we read a couple readings on poetry. THE NAME AND NATURE OF POETRY, by A.E. Housman and THE POETRY HANDBOOK, by Mary Oliver. Both of these readings were written to help people understand poetry more. Each gave their own thoughts, opinions, examples, and interpretations of poetry. It's always nice to read about poetry here and there, and although I've been studying poetry in at least one English class from the time I was in 8th grade...I still find things to learn. Poetry is so beautiful, and I absolutely love to read it. I always had an appreciation for poetry, but it was not until my AP English class my senior year of high school, when I realized the absolute beauty that is poetry. We analyzed and looked at all sorts of poetry; from Ralph Waldo Emerson to William Carlos Williams. Speaking of...William Carlos Williams, MY FAVORITE poem is:

THE RED WHEELBARROW

so much depends
upon

a red wheel
barrow

glazed with rain
water

beside the white
chickens.

I don't know why I like it, as much as I do. I think it has to be becasue it's so simple, yet there is an even greater meaning of the Red Wheelbarrow. I rememeber we had to write an essay on it, analyzing it, including our opinions of it. It was a really neat assignment, because everyone wrote so many different takes on what The Red Wheelbarrow is.

Poetry is mysterious. Sometimes the meanings and the reasons why it was written are so clear...other times they have to be discovered. I love poetry, because with poetry I actually enjoy analyzing each line and finding the true meaning or the possible meaning. It could possibly be one of my hidden secrets. haha...what can I say? Poetry is just amazing.

Short Stories

Growing up in elementary school, I loved to write. I've always loved writing and creating a story that is fun. When I was younger, I had a dream of being a writer, and although that dream isn't mine anymore, I haven't lost the love of writing. My writing today, consists of plays. Yes, I playwright. It's different from writing short stories, but that's just how writing in my life as evolved. Writing a play is like writing a short story. You have to plan out the story and objective you want to convey, but you tell it through the characters you develop. Currently, I've written only four plays, but it's a bit hard for me to just write to write. I have to have an idea to run with, and sometimes in all the chaos of school I don't pay attention to those ideas around me. So, until I have time, I write all my ideas down in a "Actors Journal" but I also write down small conversations I over hear and things that stand out to me. I love to read in general, and it's always a plus when I get to read what I want to read, and not have to read what I'm told to read. However, sometimes things I have to read, turn out to be very interesting.

I just read, HOMELAND AND OTHER STORIES by Barbara Kingsolver. This story was about a couple who have been married for three years. Lena wanted to have children, but her husband didn't want to have kids. It was a story of discovering the true happiness in the lives of people. Some people are happy just being married. Other people are happy with a big family. There was a quote in the story that stood out to me. Lena's husband says, "As I looked at her there among the pumpkins I was overcome with color and the intensity of my life. In these moments we are driven to try to hoard happiness by taking photographs..." I think that is so true, I take pictures all the time. I scrapbook and taking pictures is just something I do, to captivate the memories of my life. In the end of this story Lena's husband realizes that this is truely what his wife wants. He realizes that he want's to make her happy. That captivating the memories of his life would be amazing and what he wants if it was with Lena. He wants his life to be filled with joy.

I also read, THE WOMAN WHO LOST HER NAMES, by Nessa Rapoport. This story was about a young girl who is jewish and is growing up in America. She's away from the culture and society of where you family is from. She was given the name SALLY in school, to make the "adjustment" easier. IT was like society just assumed that she'd have a hard time, and so to make things easier they were going to give her a different name. Her name is Sarah Josephine. She went through life feeling different, sometimes it was a good different and sometimes it was a bad different. She wasn't blonde and blue eyed like girls in her class. She had dark flowing hair, and was a true free spirit, however, she felt that it was hard to fully fit in. She met and married a man who brought out happiness in her. She longed to go back to Isreal, and she ended up marrying the man having kids, and she lived in New York for awhile. Finally, the time came where it was the right time to "go home." They went to Jerusalem, and she felt a sence of calmness. She was also thankful. She had a daughter, and it was then time to name her. The struggle to find the perfect name...was presented. They left it to the Torah, awaiting the answer to be read and presented to them. It really is a great short story. Names are so important. I just watched the Prayer for Jabez in church. Jabez was a man who was born, and his mother was in great pain when she gave birth to him. So, she named the son Jabez which means pain in hebrew. The documentary was saying that we grow into our names, we become our names. He prayed to God to expand his territory and to protect him from pain, and God granted the request. His name meant pain, but he didn't have to represent his name, he could change it. He changed his destiny. It's interesting that this story put so much pressure on names, but names are important. I just think that names should be given to the baby out of love and kindness, and it's then the baby's life to grow and learn to be who they want to be. I wish I could say that names shouldn't be taken seriously, they are important, but I think that at the end of this short story the family realized that whatever happens, is meant to happen, and they were relieved.

I love writing and I hope that in my career my writing will develop and help me as a person grow into a great person. I want to continue to be surprised with my life and to continue to learn as a person, just like the people in these stories.