Sometimes You Just Feel Blah And That's Okay

It's interesting how days evolve. Thinking about that today, I realized that there are just bad days, and sometimes bad, bad days. It can be the simplest things, from running late to work and spilling water all over your desk, to...something deeper. Sometimes, it's your emotions that eat you up, and devour your happiness.

Some days, you just need to be alone and cry, and other days you just need to be around friends and family. Whatever kind of day you're having, you need to break through the sadness.

For me?...I only have these bad days, if it starts with the spilling of water or the breaking of my favorite tea cup. Those little things have the ability to set me off into a spiral of feeling hopeless for myself. Lame...I know. I'm usually a very happy person. It takes a lot to make me upset or angry, and sometimes I wonder if it's because I'm so happy, that sometimes I can swing the other way, crewed up by my emotions, so drastically. Another part of me says it's because I'm creative, and I'm an actor...being more impacted to emotions and energy of everything around me.

My point? I have one, I promise.

There comes a time in life, when one reassesses his or her current state. I think I'm at that moment. I love my life. I love the people in it; my family and friends, the ones who make me smile every day over the silliest things or the most simple of comments. Lately, I've been reassessing my work life and life. I'm feeling the itch to move on, and I'm looking for something new...a new adventure to grow more, and to learn more.  This new adventure will continue to guide me down the path which God has set for my life. I also want to travel. A nice SOLO TRIP around the world. My trip, although not around the world completely, I hope will be an awakening to me. An awakening, in the sense, not that I need to “find myself,” but in the sense of exploring; getting out, seeing new things, experiencing cultures, and the world. I want to just escape from the mundane and discover the unknown.

I've always loved traveling, and for a while, I wanted a job that caused me to travel a lot, for quite some time, just so I could see the world. My job and life, will always be one that causes me to work more constantly, with not a lot of time off...it's just the field I'm in, but that doesn't mean I still don't want to travel. In fact, it makes me want to escape even more. I need to break up the rituals of the days, and I need to discover new happy memories.

I've wanted to travel for quite some times...years in fact. Ever since I was in high school, and first saw the Amazing Race, I was like, “Jenn, you're going to travel around the world someday too." Now, my dreams are more grandeur than I can afford, but I have come up with a few trips that will make me happy.

TRIP ONE: Fly into Iceland for some sightseeing and hopes of catching the Northern Lights. Then off to Stockholm, Sweden for a few days, followed by a tour of London and Liverpool, England, with visits to Scotland and Ireland.

TRIP TWO: Greece.

TRIP THREE: New Zealand and Australia.

When I travel, I want to see it all! So...short stops aren't always possible for what I'd like to have on my itinerary...and Trip One...definitely happening.  Someday.

Today, as I type this, my phone is playing music...helping me to calm down and to relax...The playlist? Well, here you go:

Hide and Seek by Imogen Heap – https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UYIAfiVGluk

What Hurts the Most by Cascada – https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PprQOCoGHjU

Linger by The Cranberries – https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=G6Kspj3OO0s

Breakable by Ingrid Michaelson – https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VHW_cH39YIY

In Your Shoes by Sarah McLachlan – https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wh1ZJ8OYpLQ

Maybe Not by Cat Power – https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NdlOdztF0ac

Keep Holding On by Avril Lavigne – https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zfcZpRm5M5I

It's interesting how music can truly reflect how you feel. It can help you feel better or cause you to dive deeper into the “woe is me” emotions you've allowed yourself to feel. We do need to “Keep Holding On”, so that we can look forward to something exciting and something worthwhile. No matter “What Hurts the Most” or if you want to just “Linger” or if you feel “Breakable”...we must find that thing to help us to keep moving forward.

For me...? Right now, it's knowing I have the power to change my circumstances, and yes we all do!! WE just need to take hold of it tightly and GO FOR IT! So...I'm job searching and I'm planning on traveling. Truth. Hands down.

Take a look at these helpful links, if you're feeling the drive to travel yourself. They really helped me out a lot.

What really woke me up and caused me to think strongly on the whole solo travel thing...was a wonderful blog by Nomad Matt – http://www.nomadicmatt.com/travel-tips/buying-a-rtw-ticket/

I also discovered this Huffington Post blog on the “10 Reasons Why You Should Travel Alone” – http://m.huffpost.com/us/entry/7840036?ncid=tweetlnkushpmg00000033   

If you're a woman like me and decide to travel alone, view this blog for some helpful tips – "The Very Best Advice For Women Traveling Alone" – http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2015/07/30/how-to-travel-alone_n_7851586.html?ncid=tweetlnkushpmg00000045

My point...is yes, we have days where we feel stuck, bored, unmotivated, blah, and plain old unhappy. Let the emotions take over. Cry if you need to. Go to the gym and work it off that way too. Do whatever you need to do to let yourself have the “woe is me...wahhh” kind of day or moment...and then move on. It's just a bump in the road that you're on. You will continue to grow and learn. You will continue to love, find happiness, and discover new memories and adventures. You just need to be patient. You need to let things happen as they will...and hold on to what is yet to come. It will be worth it, I promise.